Happy Thursday. On this day in 1968, Molly Ringwald was born and immediately began giving nerds false hope.

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HE SHOWED US HIS GUN. He brought in his brother and his mom. And he finally got contact lenses.

IT WAS SUPPOSED TO BE AN 80s MOVIE where the guy who seems as if he’s constantly on the verge of tears finally stands up to the bully and prevails.

BUT JEB BUSH LOST South Carolina governor Nikki Haley's endorsement Wednesday – and if he finishes in fourth place with single digits there this weekend, as most polls suggest he will, his campaign could be done by Monday.

SOMEHOW, HE'D BE LEAVING THIS CAMPAIGN in more disgrace than a brother who led us into two losing wars, let a city drown and saw our entire economy catch fire like a Christmas tree set too close to the hearth.

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ON WEDNESDAY NIGHT, MSNBC proved that it’s the liberal news channel the same way the History Channel is the history channel.

WHILE TED CRUZ, MARCO RUBIO, Ben Carson and Jeb Bush took their turns answering a few questions from CNN’s Anderson Cooper, Donald Trump joined his fellow cast members of MSNBC’s Morning Joe for a free infomercial.

THE CLOSEST THING TO AN INTERESTING MOMENT came when Mika Brzezinski read a quote describing an inspiring populist candidate drawing huge crowds and winning over people with promises of universal health care.

TRUMP THOUGHT SHE WAS TALKING ABOUT TRUMP. She was talking about Bernie Sanders.

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IT WAS THE SHOW THAT TAUGHT US that traditional marriage should be between one man and two dozen aspiring model/actresses.

THE BACHELOR IS NOW NEARING the end of its twentieth season and "The Bachelor at 20: A Celebration of Love" took the show’s millions of viewers back to 2002 when America was still naive enough to not predict that the black guy gets a rose to continue through a couple of rounds before the bachelorette eliminates him.

IN 19 COMPLETE SEASONS, there have been 11 proposals – one couple is still together and another Bachelor married his runner-up. But all of the Bachelors and their potential mates are united by a unique experience and the possibility of having contracted several venereal diseases.

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ONE OF THE UNDENIABLE PROBLEMS in American government is the revolving door between Wall St. and Washington D.C., which is more like a two-way waterslide filled with Cristal and the tears of foreclosed homeowners.

THAT'S HOW YOU GET A SECURITY EXCHANGE COMMISSION unwilling to embrace a basic “fiduciary standard” – Legalese for “your broker shouldn’t be allowed to knowingly screw you” – even after a 2011 report said one was necessary.

SO THE FACT THAT AN EX-GOLDMAN SACHS EMPLOYEE like Neel Kashkari, now the head of the Minneapolis Fed, said this week that we should consider breaking up the big banks means that maybe we should listen. Or make a statue of some sort to show our appreciation for someone so willing to completely screw his future earning potential.

KASHKARI IS PRETTY SURE THAT "we won't see the next crisis coming" – and given that Wall St. certainly didn’t see Kashkari’s comments coming, that’s probably a pretty sound prediction.

NO, BERNIE SANDERS DID NOT DODGE THE DRAFT. He was too old to be drafted in the Vietnam War, which he opposed, and the Vietnamese army didn’t want him anyway.

ODDS BALL—A new study finds that men in their mid-eighties are about twice as likely to have had sex in the last year as similar aged women because there aren’t enough men to go around, which is either the worst or best part of getting older.