Happy Friday. On this day in 1970, the first Earth Day was celebrated so at least the planet could enjoy its golden years.

AS NEWS OF PRINCE ROGERS NELSON'S DEATH at 57 was confirmed on Thursday afternoon, much of America fell into shock and mourning.

THROUGHOUT HIS CAREER, Prince was a groundbreaking and beloved artist who combined the showmanship of a frontman with the technical virtuosity of a musical genius. (Eric Clapton was reportedly once asked how it felt to be the world's best guitarist. "I don't know,” he said. “Ask Prince.”)

WHEN IT COMES TO OUR ARTISTIC ICONS, 2016 has provided more than enough bad news already. We were blindsided earlier this year by the death of David Bowie, but unlike Prince, at least the Thin White Duke made it to nearly 70 – old enough that even a few conservatives would think he was at a reasonable retirement age.

IF DONALD TRUMP becomes president there will be a worldwide freakout, Politico now reports.

“IN MEETINGS, private dinners and phone calls, world leaders are urgently seeking explanations [of Trump’s rise] from Obama and Vice President Joe Biden, Secretary of State John Kerry, Defense Secretary Ash Carter and Trade Representative Michael Froman on down,” the nation’s favorite politics-as-porn site says.

AS A RESULT, world leaders are scrambling to get deals done before Obama leaves office and America elects its own Vladimir Putin with a weave. It’s like the opposite of a bachelor party: the world wants to make a ton of commitments before it enters into a mandatory period of debauchery.

JOHN KASICH MAY BE a little strange, but he's also kind of honest. “Frankly, my Republican Party doesn’t like ideas,” the Ohio governor told the Washington Post editorial board as part of a barnstorming campaign to lock down his core constituency: the media.

ASKED WHICH REPUBLICANS do believe in ideas, Kasich pivoted to his favorite subject: His glory days of the 1980s. Rather than focus on contemporary figures, he named Ronald Reagan and Jack Kemp, which is like a film critic beginning a review of Batman v. Superman with a 500-word appreciation of still photography.

SO THAT'S JOHN KASICH: A bitter man who’s only won one state, has a stalker’s obsession with Jack Kemp, and says his own party “doesn’t like ideas.” Given what Republican primary voters seem to like, how is this guy not doing better?

• In Memory of Prince
• Anatomy of the Trumpian Body
• What If The ’16 Candidates Were “Game of Thrones” Characters?
• This Quote Sadly Still Rings True Even a Century After It Was Written

YES, TARGET ALLOWS TRANS PEOPLE TO USE THE BATHROOM APPROPRIATE FOR THEIR GENDER. Because the people who think going to the bathroom is a sexual experience mostly seem to be Republican politicians.

UNKIND BUDS—Due to federal drug laws, researchers can only experiment on the effects of marijuana using extremely weak pot, a problem known to most Americans as “tenth grade.”

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