The Lost Art of Listening 

and the power of connection

It feels like we are living in a time of increasing distractions and busyness that can impact on our ability to be present to others and to genuinely have the time and capacity to listen effectively.  

​Yet the basic human need to be valued, to be included and to matter to our significant others remains.

So it is no surprise that our society and workplaces report increasing levels of loneliness, depression and disconnection.

​Here are a few tips on being a better listener and take the quiz to see how you are doing!

Let 'LISTEN' remind you of some basic skills in listening:

L – Look at the person when they are talking to you -    be present in the moment

I – Inquire, ask open questions - "tell me more about that..."

S – Summarise what you have heard – use skills of    reflecting and paraphrasing

T – Take notes – literal or mental- notice body language - it is 55% of communication 

E – Encourage – smile, minimal encouragers to let the person know you are listening

N – Neutralise your response and never take over

Key listening skills to practice

•Attending – showing you are interested

•Reflecting – showing you understood what the person said

•Paraphrasing /Summarising – checking our meaning and interpretation, bringing discussion to a focus or summary

•Effective Questioning – open or closed – very important skill

•Neutral response/minimal encouragers - a nod, Ah hah, Mmmm......

The Listening Quiz 

The most effective way to improve communications is to become a better listener.

To determine your listening ability, take this test:
        

I anticipate what people will say next as they are speaking.      

 Yes      No
        

I’m constantly judging the merit of what people say from the very first sentence.

Yes      No
        

I discount what other people say, if they don’t agree with my opinions and values.

Yes      No
        

I rarely pay attention to people’s nonverbal cues (such as body language and facial expressions).

Yes      No
        

I let my biases and opinions affect my ability or willingness to listen to what some people say.

Yes      No
        

I prepare what I’m going to say in response while the other person is talking.

Yes      No
        

I often interrupt people to speed along a conversation or to inject my opinion.

Yes      No
        

If I disagree with people, I interrupt them immediately to set the record straight.

Yes      No
        

Most of the time, I am ready with an response right when the other person stops talking.

Yes      No
        

If the other person is long winded or boring, I stop listening.

Yes      No
        

When I stop paying attention to someone, I try to look like I’m listening anyway.

Yes      No
         

When I know what people are going to say, I don’t wait for them to finish, but answer right away.

Yes   No

How did you rate yourself? 

​The key is to become aware and practice, practice, practice!

“Wisdom is the reward you get for a lifetime

of listening when you would have

preferred to talk”

Doug Larson

EAPworks can assist in facilitating team communication workshops in your workplace or work with you as an individual to develop your listening skills... 

EAPworks 0800 SELFHELP - 0800 735 343