THE ANSWER TO EVERYTHING

Sadly, the digital defense has run out of steam.  Now the universal marketing solution is Artificial Intelligence. How is Mr. Zuckerberg going to correct all the horrors he has visited on the world? Simple, AI. And in an era in which citizens of the world are feeling less powerful than ever, the inside-the-bubble-boys of Microsoft are haranguing us with how much power we have as a result of AI. It's just a darn shame how unappreciative we are of all the miracles these AI guys are bestowing on us.

Once again, no one knows what the hell all this AI tongue jiggling is about, but the new crop of utopian imbeciles who once thought digital technology was going to make the world safe for virtual reality goggles and kale smoothies are now assaulting us with non-stop horseshit about the miracle of AI. As The Washington Post says, "Just don't ask them when or how."

This week the new chairman of the IAB (Interactive Advertising Bureau) - probably the most backward of all the backward advertising trade organizations - went to LinkedIn to tell us how he is going to solve all the nightmare problems of tracking, surveillance, and election tampering that his glorious adtech ecosystem has enabled. His answer, you guessed it...

    "Enter AI...There is tremendous potential for AI to make the connections and foster the relationships the digital marketing industry has been chasing for the last decade."

Pardon me for being skeptical but this baloney sounds frighteningly like the tortured AI logic of Zuckerberg. It goes something like this... You know all that data we've stolen from you without your permission and all the trouble it's caused? Well, we're gonna solve those problems by grabbing more data about you and have it talk to the old data. Cool, huh?

Meanwhile, back on Planet Earth, here's what's happening in the real world of AI. Have a good look at these nice folks.

What do these people have in common? Simple. They're not people. Not one of them is a real human. Each is an imaginary person created by AI. Can't see how any mischief can accrue from this.

But that ain't all. This week, a company called OpenAI said that it had created a fake text generator that is so good at mimicking human writing, they are afraid to release it to the public.

Before you start thinking that AI, powered by "big data," is a problem for the future, here's some bad news. According to Rishad Tobaccowala, chief growth officer of Publicis, "the global trade value of data flows is greater than the global trade value of merchandise." That is one scary data point.

And what is the primary engine driving surveillance, online spying, and the unregulated collection of private data? It's adtech. It's you and me, pal. Big Brother has arrived and he's us.

If you have not written to the IAB, the 4As, and the ANA to express your disgust at their fanatical, unrelenting support for these dreadful practices, today's the day to do so.

As predicted in my book (plug alert) BadMen, the Cambridge Analytica scandal brought these lies to light and gave the world a first glimpse at how irresponsible, dangerous, and incompetent Facebook is.

I have no idea what kind of agreement Facebook will be made to sign with the FTC but I can guarantee you this -- the minute they sign it they will be in violation of it.

According to the Journal, a recent gimmick in online advertising called ads.txt purportedly allows buyers to know if the inventory they are buying is real or fraudulent. Buyers can see if the inventory has an "ads.txt" seal of approval. When missing, this ostensibly alerts buyers to fraudulent websites. Except, as usual, the fraudsters are miles ahead of the industry and have found inventive ways of acquiring the ads.txt "badge."

As an aside, fraud experts I know have very little faith in the whole ads.txt enterprise.

The importance of creativity in advertising continues to be devalued, and there is no other voice as credible as Lee's to speak in support of the stuff that makes advertising work -- the fucking ads.

They were shocked. Shocked! They demanded to see the manager! They swore up and down that they would put an end to these shocking practices and protect their brands by requiring "full transparency." And, to their credit, while the cameras were running they did so. Then the lights went out and so did all the air.

Knowing how full of shit the whole thing was, I was (surprise!) skeptical of their  posturing and wrote that in the long run..."agencies and marketers don't seem to give a damn where their ads run just as long as they're cheap."

This week, Digiday supported my case with an article entitled, "When It Comes To Agencies, Brands Care More About Cost Than Transparency." The take-away from the piece is that brands don't really care how you achieve lower ad costs, just as long as you do.

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