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#246/ May 2, 2021
ANA'S RIP VAN WINKLE MOMENT
This week the ANA (Association of National Advertisers) awoke from its decade-long coma and decided to find out how its members have been getting screwed out of billions of dollars by the programmatic ad ecosystem. Nope, you can't put one over on the ol' ANA.
The group issued an RFP for someone to study the impossibly arcane and corrupt programmatic apparatus and explain to them why their members have been getting fucked blind all these years.
The ANA may very well be the most feckless trade association in the glorious history of feckless trade associations. These are the guys who...
- Have fought every initiative to protect consumers, democratic institutions, and their own members from the dangerous, slimy adtech ferrets who have been responsible for the very mischief they are now looking to expose.
- Reported to their members in 2019 that the "War On Ad Fraud Is Succeeding" at exactly the time it was exploding.
- Reported years ago that only 25% of online ad dollars ever reached the consumer, and since then have done...what? Whine? Hold meetings? Support the miscreants?
- Oh yeah, and after months of back-and-forth cancelled a podcast they had asked for with a certain blogweasel 20 minutes before the recording because "it had snowed" the night before. Not that I hold a grudge...
Continuing the insane, willful denial of criminality and corruption in adtech world, the CEO of the ANA issued a delightfully hilarious disclaimer when he announced this cockamamie RFP: “We’ve not necessarily heard rumors saying there was any kind of misappropriation, ... We are saying the way the ecosystem was constructed is not optimal..." Give me a fucking break.
The motivation for this initiative seems to be coming from a study conducted by the British ISBA and auditors at PwC. After two-years of research they reported that 50% of programmatic ad dollars never went to advertising, but were vacuumed up by the adtech vampires before they got to online publishers. Perhaps equally disturbing was that 15% of all ad dollars (and 30% of the "non-working" dollars) were completely untraceable and unaccounted for among the most sophisticated and highest profile advertisers like Disney, Unilever and Nestlé. Imagine what the numbers must be for losers like us.
Overall, the ISBA found that only 12% of ad dollars tossed into the programmatic sausage machine were traceable end-to-end. With over $300 billion invested annually in online advertising, and 80% of it run through the programmatic black box, the amount of money unaccounted for is staggering.
Perhaps the most remarkable thing about this whole programmatic shit show is how the trade associations pretend they still haven't connected the dots between adtech and... fraud, corruption, absence of transparency, ineffectiveness, consumer disgust, public disrepute and the breathtaking evaporation of their constituents' money.
Mr. ANA, I think I can save you a lot of time and cash. Cancel your stupid, unnecessary RFP and tell your dumbshit members to stop their programmatic dumpster diving and buy directly from quality publishers. No charge.
And suppliers beware: I suspect these clowns are sending out an RFP to find someone who'll provide cover for them for their years of ignorance and incompetence. If you really want the gig slip the ANA a little note saying, "We already know what's wrong. It's everyone's fault but yours."
Tweet of the Week
My favorite comment on this ANA charade came from the great Don Marti poking fun at both the marketing industry and a certain blogweasel...
Awesome Cage Fight
For good old fashioned family fun and entertainment you can't beat the shit fight that's developing over at WPP, the world's largest advertising holding company. Mark Read, WPP's CEO, and the rest of the WPP hotshots are refusing to pay Sir Martin Sorrell, who founded WPP, zillions in alimony they owe him from their tragically failed love affair.
Read was once Sorrell's peg boy and says that they don't have to pay Sorrell what they owe him because back in the day Sorrell "leaked client information to the media." Ohmygod! I'm sure this a shocking revelation to the unsuspecting Mr. Read who had no idea what the dastardly Sorrell was up to.
I can't wait to see what happens when Sir Marty's lawyers get Read on the stand and ask him about all the things he "didn't know" Sorrell was doing. This should be rollicking good fun.
EU Sues Apple
While we're in court...this week, the European Union sued Apple accusing it of anti-competitive behavior in its App Store. Imagine... ad tech giants engaged in anti-competitive behavior! Is there nothing left to believe in? Some background...
In recent years Apple has evolved its business from hardware to include software based services like the App Store, Apple Music (formerly iTunes,) and Apple Pay. These have become huge contributors to its skyrocketing profitability.
Between the App Store and the Google Play store, these two giants account for 95% of app sales. In addition to the 30% cut Apple (and Google ) take of app sales, Apple also takes a 30% cut of any in-app sales by demanding that all sales go through the Apple payments system.
This has lead to some nasty accusations between Apple and app developers like Spotify who don't want to pay Apple a 30% vig on everything they sell for the rest of eternity.
I suspect adjudicating this will take years. Or if it goes at the speed that the EU usually moves, it may take centuries.
Consumers Don't Really Care
Despite all the marketing hyperventilating over "brand purpose" a study released last week reported that about 70% of consumers said brand activism has no influence on their buying decisions. Of course consumers never really understand what motivates them and always overestimate their altruism and nobility. Consequently, I'd guess the real number is closer to 90%.
Nonetheless, in this study about twice as many consumers say that what influences them most is product quality, not brand activism. Any marketer who didn't already know this needs to find a new profession.
Mr. Mouth
Had a lovely chat with Paul Bainsfair, Director General of the IPA (Institute for the Practitioners of Advertising) in London this week. The IPA is similar to the 4As except they actually do stuff. Our conversation will appear in their podcast in a few weeks. I'll let you know.
And while we're in Jolly Old...a certain unnamed blogweasel has been asked to speak to members of Parliament in a few weeks about issues related to online advertising and marketing surveillance. Question: Are you allowed to say "bullshit" to lords and ladies? Asking for a friend.
