It’s best to pretend certain things never happened. That chocolate bar you ate for breakfast? Put the wrapper at the bottom of the rubbish bin and deny everything. That flirty move you made on your (as it turns out, uninterested) yoga teacher? You were just being friendly. That year-long lag since Clothing for Correspondence last sent out a newsletter? You’re imagining things.

But when someone asks you to move out of the small apartment you are sharing with them, is it really possible to just carry on as though the conversation never happened? Brad thought it was. And Nicole needed our help to tell him that it wasn’t.

Dear Brad

Something funny has been happening around my house lately. I go into the bathroom and the shower is all wet. I say to myself, ‘Someone’s been showering in my bathroom.’ I go into the spare room and find the spare bed disheveled and unmade. I say to myself, ‘Someone’s been sleeping in my spare room.’ I go into the kitchen and I see someone cooking dinner. I say to myself, ‘Someone is making Pasta Arrabiata in my kitchen… after I asked him to move out.’

Read on...


And how about when your friend's divorce is messing up your friendship circle? Should you say something? Letter requester James explains the dilemma best in his email:

"Good friends of mine, Matt and Elena, split up last year and, while I thought I was equally friends with both of them, only Matt has stayed in contact with me. I’ve tried to reach out to Elena but she seems to be avoiding me. I feel like they’ve decided amongst themselves who gets to keep me as a friend but the thing is, if I only get to be friends with one of them, I’d actually prefer Elena..."

Of course we revelled in his sticky situation and helped out with this:

Dear Matt and Elena

Let’s start by saying that I know you are no longer ‘Matt and Elena.’ It’s for simplicity (and transparency) that I address you both in the same letter. You know that biblical passage that people read at weddings: Love is patient and kind…Love never fails…? It’s a wish that gets stated as a truism. The reality is that sometimes love is an arsehole and fairly often it fails us dismally. I don’t need to tell you guys that.

Read on...


Presently, we both live in Victoria, Australia, where it is cold and dark and miserable. So let's call these pics of sunshine frolicks in summer frocks evidence of how long it's been since we've sent you a newsletter. We're very sorry – it'll never happen again.

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Till next time

Jane and Penny xx | unsubscribe | Got friends scotty? Let em know