Police officer tries to avoid breaking badly. After reports of an armed hostage-taker inside a King and Blue Jays Way dispensary turned out to be false, Constable Allyson Douglas-Cook met the press—although not without a little bit of levity in the air:

A doctor and a pastor walk into some tabloid headlines. Wayne Jones is accused of forcing Baptist church parishioners into an intimate exorcism. (Toronto Sun front: "SEX HEX.") Meanwhile, family physician Dr. Nigel Phipps admitted at a disciplinary hearing that he thought it was funny to show naked selfies to patients, but now admits: “I realize people don’t think what you think.” (Toronto Sun front: "COURT JESTER.")

Sears Canada shopper cries that she feels "very used." Drama continues to surround the store closures. Meanwhile, competing retailers fear that the bankruptcy discounts will spoil their Christmas, Sears pensioners still fear they’ll get screwed, and news media made good use of the Zapruder film of the retail apocalypse at Fairview Mall. The wind-down process has also led to complaints about the pricing tactics of liquidation operators:

Requiem for the Green Room. The Brunswick House was recently Rexalled, but its more mellow back-alley neighbour managed to hang on a bit longer— until this weekend, when it will be closing ahead of a move to 414 College. Edward Keenan delivers a column contemplating its cultural significance, including its health-code-breaking hiatus in 2010, which Torontoist documented at the time in “Watergate-scandal-level detail.”

Galleria Magazine avoids telling you what's going on there today. As part of their attempt to win over the locals, the developers who are trying to build condos on the site of the Galleria Mall splurged on a slick 96-page publication, focused on local hipster aesthetics. But it avoids coverage of the still-extant mall—like how its stage is used to commemorate Halloween in a unique way. Nonethless, Dead Set on Life star Matty Matheson knows an authentic television backdrop when he sees one:

Free Speech Comedy Show gets some priceless promotion. The event that the Comedy Bar cancelled in August, after its locks were smashed, is being remounted at the Isabel Bader Theatre on November 4 with the endorsement of Jordan Peterson—who was on the academic panel discussion at Ryerson that protesters pushed into a similar postponement—the very scenario the comedy event aspired to satirize. The organizer of the protests admits that she's being kept busy:

Pen flipping ain’t what it used to be. Dave Hodge’s reaction to a CBC decision to cut away from an overtime game made him the stuff of legend, even if it led to him being replaced by Ron MacLean. Thirty years later, Hodge has walked off his job as host of TSN’s The Reporters, which led to its cancellation. Sadly, rather than a recording of how things went down, all we get is a tweet from David Shoalts.

Word of the moment


MPP Yvan Baker plans to reveal his "Phones Down, Heads Up Act" on Monday, targeting walkers distracted by smartphones, just in time for Halloween.

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