“NXNE Fire Sale! 25% Off All Port Lands Wristbands.” The music festival sent an email with this subject line at 11:25 a.m. yesterday, while a smoke plume lingered over the city. A fire had been burning for 10 hours at the GFL recycling plant, located in the very same Port Lands. “Without full approval,” per the explanation in the message that followed, is just another word for not paying attention to a pre-scheduled email:

Both ends of Queen struggling with shuttered storefronts. Businesses between University and Bathurst are closing because of rent increases—to the benefit of one upscale Taco Bell. And a similar type of thing is happening in the Beaches.

Uber never fails to compensate for bad news. Continuing its talent for distracting from unfavourable attention, Uber Toronto held a charitable event for refugees right after a local driver was charged with kidnapping a passenger.

Hard Rock Café could become a new Amsterdam. Last night was the last call for the tourist trap at 279 Yonge. Replacing it will be what Joe Warmington calls “a special Shoppers store focused on cosmetics.” But speculation that the new drug store will incorporate some kind of marijuana component is somewhat corroborated by how hard Shoppers Drug Mart parent Loblaw has lobbied MPs.

Conservatives set to bring in a new era of shitposting. Party convention memes commenced with a caution that delegates shouldn’t get confused by Anime North, which is taking place next door. An expected Maxime Bernier win brings hope that supporters will resume their social media salutes; after all, it’s the only way to compete with breathless headlines for staged photobombs.

Faith Goldy is primed to prevent “The Uncuckening.” There's an effort afoot to convince advertisers to blacklist The Rebel. Naturally, Ezra Levant is retaliating. Meanwhile, Rebel coverage of the Conservative convention is aiming to sniff out any sellouts. Leading the brigade during this weekend's festivities will be the correspondent who confused followers with this moral equivalence: 

Condo boards taking revenge on sketchy serial members. CBC News revealed that three men were systematically getting themselves elected to condo boards in buildings they didn’t live in. Now they've been turfed from at least one of those boards. (Still, they allegedly succeeded at steering at least one contract in their favour.)