Sears doesn’t want to go out looking like Zellers (let alone Target). Court documents reveal that most of the 59 stores Sears Canada will start clearing out on July 21 aren’t allowed to use the words “bankruptcy,” “liquidation” or “going out of business” and are also forbidden from using “giant balloons, flashing lights or amplified sounds.” (The guidelines are presumably meant to protect their mall landlords from tacky optics.). Not helping: the story of 36-year employee Peter Myers, jilted after recruiting a star to promote the company’s survival:

Tim Hortons can’t roll down its bad press. The battle between front-line Timbit merchants and parent company Restaurant Brands International gets a wider look at Bloomberg News, with details about how franchisees are now stocking up on sugar at Costco because it’s cheaper than buying from RBI. Meanwhile, the company keeps on with its expansion in the U.K., where former University of Glasgow student David Mole is remembered for building a guerrilla Tim Hortons store 15 years ago.

Celebrities might be best at pitching legal weed. Ontario has launched an online survey for public input on marijuana legalization, and a UBC study indicates illegal dispensaries are seen as safe despite all the raids. Now, concerns about the appropriate way to advertise marijuana are coming to the fore. Smoking accessory retailer Prohibition recently set up an interactive billboard in Ottawa that automatically sent a tweet to the likes of Justin Trudeau or Seth Rogen when a puff was detected. Yet, rich rappers are willing to do promotion for free:

Bullying expert settles with her jilted co-author. Barbara Coloroso admitted to perjury and agreed to a $20,000 settlement with philanthropist Andrew Faas seven years after the two agreed to collaborate on a book on bullying in the workplace. Coloroso accused Faas of plagiarizing her work, and sued for $5 million, after he wrote a book on bullying himself. The dispute was covered by the Toronto Star. Coloroso denied being the newspaper's source while under oath. (Turns out, she actually was.)

A five-star podcast interview with Frank D’Angelo. Mike on Much spent months trying to wrangle the apple juice auteur. Success arrived in time for D’Angelo to talk up his latest speedily-shot production, The Neighborhood. The wide-ranging chat with deadpan Much producer Shane Cunningham finds Frank lashing out at critics he feels criticize him personally, recapping a music career that dates back to 1981, and astonishingly revealing that he’s not a fan of Donald Trump.

“Mayonnaise is my favourite thing on earth. In my twenties I wrote a play called MAYONNAISE. It was about, among other things, mayonnaise.” Globe and Mail columnist John Ibbitson took a break from politics to tweet an enthusiastic response to Vice’s Manisha Krishnan's impassioned defence of mayo. While the script is now out of print, it can still be purchased on Amazon for as low as $388.98, and it lives in the Tarragon Theatre archives. Later, it was used for a sitcom pilot produced by the CBC:

Jagmeet Singh is rounding up support. Despite ongoing questions about how Sikh symbols will play in Quebec, the Brampton MPP's federal leadership bid has attracted 17 endorsements, compared to 11 for Charlie Angus—who went on the attack, even calling Singh the worst thing imaginable: a Liberal.

Word of the moment

THESE 👏 CALLS 👏 TIE 👏 UP 👏 OUR 👏 LINES!!!

Toronto Police broke out the clapping hands sign emoji to advise the public not to dial 911 just because another customer in a restaurant failed to flush a toilet.




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