Kevin O’Leary doesn't sound entirely sure of which side of the border he's on. Conservative leadership candidates squared off at the Eglinton Grand theatre on Sunday, but one hopeful was nowhere to be found. While official word was that O’Leary—who now says he would only serve as party leader if he's also the prime minister—was celebrating his 27th wedding anniversary in Miami, that didn't stop him from making a quick appearance on MSNBC, where he said “we” need to pick a new direction on healthcare policy in America:

Fringe candidates are required to enliven the most boring of by-elections. Five federal ridings will pick replacement MPs today, although no upsets are expected. But it’s the first time that Above Zoneofthe, who ran in three provincial by-elections last year, will try to get to Ottawa. He'll be last on the ballot in Markham-Thornhill. (Znoneofthe still has a long way to go to catch John “The Engineer” Turmel, who’s ready to lose for the 90th time tonight.)

The last fight of the Dionne Quintuplets. The two still-living sisters—who, along with their deceased identical siblings, were put display in North Bay 83 years ago—gave a rare New York Times interview to speak out against a plan to move their log house across town. The city is no longer up for maintaining the former Quintland site as a tourist attraction—and no groups answered a request to maintain it. “I think the museum staying in North Bay will help to block making foolish choices, like what they did to us, you know,” says Annette. “And it will never to be repeated again.” (But her sister Cécile isn’t so sure.)

Pharmaceutical billionaire's cousins are claiming a fiduciary duty. Fifty years after Barry Sherman and some associates paid $450,000 for a laboratory, which they later sold off for proceeds that seeded pharma giant Apotex, the orphaned sons of the initial founder are still seeking the financial equivalent of 20 per cent of the family fortune. Sherman claims the entire lawsuit is an abuse of process and wants it thrown out. (Some of Sherman's wealth has helped underwrite a different dream: the show business career of Frank D'Angelo.)

Jordan Peterson’s latest request for research funding gets rejected. While his Patreon currently brings in about $28,000 a month—compared to his $176,188.20 salary, revealed on Ontario's latest Sunshine List—the U of T professor tweeted his disappointment at having a grant turned down for the first time in his career. Peterson wanted to look into personality predictors of political dispositions.

Can anybody find me somebody to buy this? Custom jerseys were presented to members of Queen at Maple Leaf Gardens when they played there February 1, 1977. A seller in Moscow is still trying to unload Freddie Mercury's one, at a minimum that’s risen about as quickly as the price of a Toronto house—last year, it was offered at $8,500.

Wife's farting deemed potential dealbreaker. The Toronto Star’s advice columnist responds to a man who was rarely intimate with the woman he married 10 months ago—only to learn she’s excessively flatulent and strives to laugh it all off. Ellie's response advocates seeking medical insights, or at least researching home remedies—but she implies that if none of this works it might be time to say goodbye.

Word of the moment

COLLEGIAL CLUTCH OF TENSION

This phrase appears in an internal memo from Globe and Mail editor-in-chief David Walmsley, in which he seems to address the deleted column by Leah McLaren.




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