Ford Nation is revived to torment John Tory. The next Ford Fest will include Doug's mayoral run announcement, according to the Toronto Star, which seemed to scoop Joe Warmington. (Scrawler consoled himself by losing a Twitter fight to Rosie O’Donnell.) Preparations seem to include getting a parody Twitter account shut down. Promotion for the event emphasizes that Friday’s free BBQ will feature veggie burgers—possibly reflecting Doug’s “ethical vegetarianism”—while the returning candidate marched in a CUPE shirt for Labour Day:

Did you hear the one about the comedy show heckled by a free press advocate? Comedy Bar will be getting $425 to pay for a damaged lock, which led to the cancellation of a “Free Speech Comedy Show." Crowdfunding for the lock repair was set up by Canadian Journalists for Free Expression—whose own staffer, Kevin Metcalf, roused the rabble against the show, because he feared the edgy comedy would bring out white supremacists. The role of CJFE became fodder for Ezra Levant, while Metcalf has moved on to monitoring the attendance at a different event.

Margaret Atwood’s eight-storey complaint in review. Admiral Road’s most famous resident’s opposition to a proposed luxury condo building at 321 Davenport put her in the crosshairs. For some media outlets, the flap was an excuse to reflect on the pitfalls of the current planning process. But then, a plot twist! Turns out Atwood and husband Graeme Gibson were planning to move into a condo, but called off the plan when Atwood's name was used as a selling point for other units in the building. She asked Twitter folk for advice on what to do:

Globe and Mail sacrifices columnist clicks to concentrate on paid subscriber bait. Leah McLaren and Tabatha Southey were both sacked with the same form letter from editor-in-chief David Walmsley (only McLaren had an acerbic retort), leading to speculation about the newspaper's shifting strategy. Margaret Wente, meanwhile, remains employed—likely because she’s popular with paying Globe customers, and not a bizarre strategy to rack up hate-clicks worth a quarter-penny.

Hillary Clinton’s golden ticket isn’t Fake News. What Happened, the losing candidate’s memoir about the 2016 U.S. election, is being promoted with personal appearances. General admission is priced around $125, but the addition of a $3,000 meet-and-greet “VIP Platinum Ticket” for Toronto fans became a talking point for the likes of Mark Steyn, who joked about "a full chorus of Macedonian content farmers dancing behind her." Further feeding the Clinton cult: her endorsement of Verrit, a digital platform consisting of banal word memes accompanied by seven-digit codes for verification of their truth.

“Return My Bong” guy had to put his clothes back on at some point. Jeffrey Shaver became a human meme for wearing brightly coloured briefs to protest the fact that the Waterloo Police seized his medical marijuana. Now his message has been emblazoned on shirts that anyone can wear:

Keeping up with the Kardashian-style self-checkout at Shoppers Drug Mart. More machines were installed throughout the summer. Shoppers Drug Mart is paying some attention to annoyed tweets concerning the robotic cashiers' vocal fry, about which they’re “sorry to hear.” (The full auditory experience can be heard here.)