Roberto Osuna’s journey from a free shirt to a captive cell. The pitcher was supposed to have his name and number on 15,000 giveaway t-shirts, to be handed out to fans at tonight's game; instead, he’s on leave after being charged with assault, and Yangervis Solarte shirts will be distributed instead. Police are now investigating the origins of a photo of Osuna in jail. Global News defended its decision to circulate the pic on the grounds that it shows famous athletes don’t receive special treatment.

The involuntary legacy of the involuntarily celibate. Politco explores the story of how a Carleton student named Alana started a mailing list two decades ago to talk to others struggling with their involuntarily celibate status, which she abbreviated as “INVCEL." The same story is the subject of a new Reply All podcast, where Alana promotes a new website, Love Not Anger. Meanwhile, the North York van attacker now has lawyers. 

Ford Nation doesn’t want any more ex-candidates. Tanya Granic Allen says the sudden end to her bid to become an MPP was a byproduct of slander. But the Ontario PCs are sticking with Meredith Cartwright, who caused a scandal by apparently hiring actors to portray supporters. Even so, her Church and Wellesley office is awful quiet:

Alice Glass is putting shattered pieces back together. Now Magazine’s cover is an interview with the Toronto singer, who accused her former musical partner, Ethan Kath, of a decade of physical and emotional abuse. Glass is using Canadian Music Week to reboot her career, while a defamation suit from Kath continues being discussed in court.

Rick Moranis is getting a little less elusive. There's finally confirmation that Moranis will join the SCTV cast at the Elgin Theatre, as part of a Martin Scorsese documentary that will premiere on CTV before landing on Netflix. Moranis’ voice was also on The Goldbergs, as a tribute to Spaceballs. It's probably the last time we'll hear from Dark Helmet:

The ugliest building to ever be plopped atop another building. That’s the expert consensus based on the rendering of plans from a developer who wants to plant this condo tower on a roof:

#530KforBecca lands a half-million away. Air Canada’s offer to fly a Michigan barista to meet his internet girlfriend if he got enough retweets came up considerably short—although 19-year-old C.J. Poirier’s concurrent GoFundMe raised $500. Faced with a potential backlash after riding the publicity, the airline perplexingly proposed a system of retweet “donations," including 162,000 from the Air Canada account, which is mainly used to field complaints.