- Introduction by Women of NATE Committee Member Erin Smith
- WON Profile: Kianna Pena
- Where will you find the Women of NATE?
- Upcoming Events
- Recent Event Highlights
- Feature Article: The Confidence Tightrope: 4 Things To Ask Yourself At Work
- Book Recommendation
Release:
June 7, 2023
Women of NATE Today Newsletter
Volume 5, Issue 6
Being in a male-dominated industry makes for some fine lines, which is why this month’s article, “The Confidence Tightrope: 4 Things To Ask Yourself At Work” by Julie Castro Abrams, really makes one think about the tightrope we, as women, have to deal with.
After reading this article, I got to thinking about how many times I have dealt with being told I was too confident or too emotional when my male counterparts could act the same way and say the same things with a similar tone and get a pat on the back or have it brushed away as “that is just how they are.” It is true, women are treated differently every step of the way in the workplace, especially in workplaces that are male-dominated, but that doesn’t mean there aren’t ways to overcome the challenges we face.
Of the four ideas in this article, one really resonated with me:
Women must support women.
Ever since I started supporting and celebrating the success of other women without jealousy or judgment, but instead with pure pride and happiness, I have found myself to be a better person. For me, it helps bring strength and confidence to hit my own goals and achievements. I believe there is enough success in this world for everyone and, as women, we should never have to apologize for having “too much” confidence; standing our ground when we are passionate about something; or having the right circle of women around us to help us grow. Being yourself is honestly the biggest life upgrade.
Women of NATE does help to fill this bucket for me professionally, and I am lucky enough to have a “Fempire” (as my friends and I call it) personally where we do nothing but support each other without judgment or jealousy. I encourage everyone to find a group of women like this in their life and be bold enough to stay true to themselves, having confidence in any situation.
If you are on Instagram, I encourage you to follow @womenontopp; it is incredibly inspiring!
We are in this together ladies. Let’s support each other! And always remember, when women support each other, incredible things happen!
Erin Smith is the Director of Marketing for Thayer Wireless Solutions and a member of the Women of NATE (WON) Committee, as well as part of the OSP Communication Task Team for NATE. She can be reached at erinsmith@thayerpc.com or 614-620-3368.
WON Profile: Kianna Pena
Kianna Pena joined Launch 3 Telecom two years ago as a member of their Sales Support team.
Kianna says it has been a great experience at Launch 3 Telecom with so much growth. During her time there, she was able to finish college and learn about the Sales/Telecom industry.
One of her favorite aspects of working at Launch 3 is the room for growth. From her first day until now, she has been able to diversify herself in the industry, as well as use the college degree for which she worked so hard. In addition to the knowledge she has gained, Kianna has also met a number of well-versed individuals that she has grown to admire. She is always learning new things in and outside of the office.
Tell us something about yourself that would surprise us.
From K-12 I’ve attended at least eight different public schools. As a child, my mother moved me all the way down the east coast, from New York to Florida. I went to two different elementary schools, three middle schools, and three high schools. The longest institution I’ve attended, was my college career of four years at Montclair State University. Thankfully, because of this I have become a much more adaptable person, which has proven to be quite helpful to my career.
What is the favorite part about working for Launch 3 Telecom?
The people. I find it very easy to come to work every day because of the people I work with. They all make the environment a welcoming and productive place. Over time, I have grown to have relationships with not only the people I work with daily but also individuals that I typically would never encounter. Most of all, the opportunities I have to meet new people also plays into what I like most about working here at Launch 3. In my time here, I have met a handful of people who have taught me some very important and beneficial skills.
What is your best achievement?
To date, I would have to say graduating college with my Bachelor’s in Justice Studies and Psychology this past month is my best achievement. In addition to attending school, I worked full-time here at Launch 3 and completed an internship for the New Jersey Department of Criminal Justice.
What's your motto?
“Treat people how you wish to be treated.” This is something that with time I have grown to believe more and more, whether it be in my friendships or with any new person I meet. I have not only instilled this into my life, but I constantly advocate this motto in other people’s lives as well.
What would you do even if you didn't get paid to do it?
For some time now I have always enjoyed the idea of being a high-powered lawyer and being able to fight for people in the courtroom. As a lawyer, I could take on cases pro-bono for families who can’t defend themselves due to unfortunate circumstances. I have witnessed and heard of many people who have been unable to defend themselves in a courtroom due to an inexperienced lawyer which is another reason why being a great lawyer would be a dream of mine.
What problems do you consistently solve for your clients?
The are several problems I would say are solved for the clients. First, we make it a priority to save time and money for the client. In addition, we work hard to give the customer an individualized buying experience. These are important distinctions of how we choose to solve issues for our clients. Finally, I would say we strive to make all processes as simplified as possible for the client and ensure the successful completion of any request made with us.
What are your hopes for our industry?
My hope for this industry is for it not to just grow, but prosper and continue to narrow the digital divide - the gap between those who have access to modern information and communication technologies and those who don't. In addition, by increasing the telecom industry's focus on sustainability, we can expand the wireless bandwidth thus distributing a more equal opportunity to wireless connectivity.
Describe yourself in three words?
To describe myself in three words I would say I’m humorous, kindhearted, and independent. For as long as I could remember I have been a very comedic and humorous person. I enjoy not only making people laugh, but also smile too. Secondly, I pride myself in being a very kindhearted person to both my friends and family, as well as new people I meet. I feel it is important to lead life with a kind heart because it tends to make any negative encounter much less stressful or trying. Finally, being independent is something that, unlike my other traits, I developed over time and am still perfecting for the future.
Who would you most like to have dinner with?
Michelle Obama. Of all the people who’ve made a mark in my life I feel if I were to have the opportunity to have dinner with one person, it would be Michelle Obama. Not only has her impression left a mark on me, but it inspired me to be this strong, educated, kind human being. There are many people both famous and not that I could choose from, but Mrs. Obama is someone that I grew to really look up to. Additionally, two people that have really played a part in my personality are Mariska Hargitay and the former First Lady Michelle Obama.
Favorite meal?
Following my Latina heritage, I would have to say my favorite meal is rice, beans, and baked chicken. Whether it’s a homecooked meal or takeout from a restaurant, I always feel happiest when eating this meal. What I would say I like most about this dish, is it has a special place in my life because it is a meal me and my late grandmother shared very often after a long day or just to show one another our love. Now, this meal is something my mom and me share with one another every so often to make ourselves happy, or just because we’re hungry. Like most, I do have the occasional pizza or tacos, but this meal will always be my favorite.
What's the biggest proof that you're good at what you do?
Here in the sales department, we get several companies sending in requests to be processed, and like others in my department, there are some companies that email just me for assistance. I find having numerous customers emailing me directly makes me much more confident in the work I do. On top of that, I get other people in and out of my department who occasionally ask for my assistance in a variety of things.
Tell us three things most people don't know about you.
Some things most people don’t know about me are that since high school I’ve been an avid Sims 4 player. This simulation game promoted so much creativity for me, on top of being a game that I and many of my friends connected with. This game, which to my knowledge, still grows in design, has been a guilty pleasure of mine for a little while now. Second, I’m happiest when I am by myself. While some people find it hard to spend time with themselves, I thrive on it. Better yet, at times I feel it is our job to be comfortable doing daily tasks all on our own, from going out to run some errands, to having dinner at a restaurant all alone. Finally, I would say most people don’t know that I love taking on new hobbies. It began with oil painting, and now I am learning a new language. I have done so many different things in such a short time in the hopes of being a well-rounded person once I’m older.
Where will you find the Women of NATE?
Take Women of NATE with you!
Are you traveling for work or taking a leisure vacation?
Take a creative photo holding a Women of NATE (WON) logo in front of a landmark that lets us know where you are.
(Above) Sarah and Pete Hagstrom of Viking Maintenance dba Finish Tower, Inc. play tourist on their trip to Washington D.C. At various times in history, the White House has been known as the "President's Palace," the "President's House," and the "Executive Mansion." President Theodore Roosevelt officially gave the White House its current name in 1901.
Submit your photos along with your name and location to nikki@natehome.com for a chance to be showcased in an upcoming Newsletter or social media post.
Upcoming Events
Join Women of NATE at the Women's Leadership Summit in Grapevine, Texas!
Register now and save money! $100 Early Bird Registration ends on June 15. Advanced Registration begins June 16 through September 21 for $150.
Now is the time to get your company's name out there by supporting and sponsoring the Women's Leadership Summit! Sponsorship opportunities are available that will fit your company.
Make your reservation today! Embassy Suites by Hilton Dallas DFW Airport North is the Host Hotel for the Women's Leadership Summit Event.
Hotel reservations are due by Wednesday, August 30, 2023. Once the Women’s Leadership Summit room block has been filled, which could occur prior to Wednesday, August 30, 2023 the hotel will not guarantee availability.
Recent Event Highlights
(Right) Chelle Eischens of VIKOR; Paula Nurnberg and Megan Reiffenberger of NATE; Sheri O'Dell-Deuer of Deuer Developments; and Stephanie Brewer of USA Telecom Insurance Services Inc. pose in front of the U.S. Capitol Building while in Washington D.C. during the 2023 NATE Congressional Fly-In event.
(Left) NATE Director of Safety and Compliance Kathy Stieler and Dave Hall of Congruex visit with Indiana Senator Todd Young at the Hoosier Huddle Constituent Coffee during the 2023 NATE Congressional Fly-In.
(Above) Cristina Cossio of SPX Aids to Navigation, and Sarah King Bratcher of JAG Resources, Inc introduce Tennessee Senator Marsha Blackburn at the 2023 Congressional Fly-In closing reception in the Senate Mansfield Room.
(Right) Jordyn Ladner of MILLERCO; Sheri O'Dell-Deuer of Deuer Developments; Richard Cullum of TSC Construction; Pat Cipov of Cipov Enterprises, Inc.; Gemma Frock of NATE; and Stephanie Brewer of USA Telecom Insurance Services Inc. hit the Hill for a day full of congressional meetings at the 2023 Congressional Fly-In.
(Left) Kat Clemmons Lea of Elk River, Inc. visits with Congressman Robert Aderholt, who represents Alabama's 4th Congressional District, and the 2023 NATE Congressional Fly-In.
(Above) NATE Board of Director Aaron Paulette of Elevated Services, LLC; NATE WIN Ohio State Liaison Nicole Paulette of Elevated Services, LLC; Mia Paulette; and Sarah King Bratcher of JAG Resources, Inc visit at the 2023 NATE Congressional Fly-In closing reception in the Senate Mansfield Room.
(Right) Ken Clark and Chelsea Hood of Engineering Wireless Services, LLC met for a day full of meetings on the Hill during the 2023 NATE Congressional Fly-In.
(Above) Women of NATE Committee members BeLinda Fadely of WANHO Manufacturing, LLC and Therese O'Brien of TESSCO Technologies stop for a selfie at Congressman Charles Albert "Dutch" Ruppersberger's office during the 2023 NATE Congressional Fly-In. Ruppersberger is the Representative of Maryland's 2nd Congressional District.
The Confidence Tightrope: 4 Things To Ask Yourself At Work
When it comes to leadership, we know men and women are given different treatment. This is starkly evident in the inequity in venture funding - only 2% goes to female founders. Of course this difference goes beyond just the monetary investment they are getting. Women are treated differently every step of the way: 85% of women founders have reported sexual harassment when seeking funding. And a pervasive cultural bias has been documented that is worth exploring. When venture capitalists vet women they ask about safety, responsibility, and security. Men, however, get asked about their accomplishments and dreams. In addition, men are more likely to receive feedback at work related to specific behaviors or skills they can use. Women on the other hand are evaluated on characteristics they are perceived to have or not have. Why are we asking women to be confident, while asking men to show more confidence? What does this say about our culture and what is the impact on women’s leadership behaviors?
One impact is that women are told to use confidence to overcome systemic barriers and responsibility is placed on women if they fail. However, that is fraught with many challenges because there is a penalty for being over confident AND under confident. I call it a tight rope which is impossible to walk consistently. Stanford calls it the “likeability penalty.” However you describe it, here is what we hear: If female founders were more confident, then they could gain more investments. If a female employee was more confident then she would ask for a raise. Yet, when trying to follow that advice, women often fall off the tightrope and are seen as bossy or worse.
“When women fail to achieve career goals, leaders are prone to attribute it to a lack of self-confidence. And when women demonstrate high levels of confidence through behaviors, such as being extroverted or assertive, they risk overdoing it and, ironically, being perceived as lacking confidence.” The Harvard Business Review perfectly illustrates How Confidence Is Weaponized Against Women.
The common theme between all of these examples: When women fail, women are blamed.
So what can we do?
Stop blaming women We need to reframe the problems we are seeing. When issues of pay inequity come up it is not because women lack confidence when negotiating. The system penalizes women for asking so we don’t. When women founders aren’t receiving the same investments as male counterparts it isn’t because they lack confidence pitching their company. Instead, we need to view these challenges as places where structural inequity likely lives. What should you be asking yourself at work to achieve this? When have I viewed failure as an individual problem not a company issue? Where is our company failing women and how can we address that?
Build a new lexicon of leadership The word confidence is likely here to stay, but are we using it correctly? Horrible decisions can be made confidently. So what is the leadership skill we are trying to convey when we use the word confidence? Decisive decision making? A positive outlook? Ability to build team rapport? An ability to ride out short term set-backs to achieve long term goals? What questions should you be asking yourself at work to build this new lexicon? What leadership skills do we say we value? What leadership skills are we actually valuing during performance reviews and promotions? Finally, how do we address the difference between those two answers?
Center women of color When you center the most vulnerable people, you ensure they are valued and successful and the majority always get their needs met. This means deeply listening, being open to change, and understanding what a different system could look like. What questions should you be asking yourself at work to center women of color? Are women of color in every room where strategy is set and decisions are being made? How many of those suggestions have been implemented?
Women must support women We know we will need to build these systems together. The other side of this confidence conundrum is that for women who have achieved success, they feel a constant need to prove their place. Unfortunately, this can mean that supporting other women can be seen as a risky venture. This attitude must change. We win by supporting each other. What questions should you be asking yourself at work to support women? When was the last time I brought another woman into the conversation? When have I recommended a woman for the promotion or elevated her role on a project?
Author Julie Castro Abrams
Julie Castro Abrams is a gender and racial justice activist who has spent the majority of her career working to build great women owned companies and economic access for women. She works with top executive women to change structures that are unequal. Her leadership impact includes changing laws on women on corporate boards, doing movement building to ensure women put board service on their path and placing women on boards.
Julie is an expert on building boards that add a strategic advantage including proactive searches for women on corporate boards.
An experienced CEO and sought-after speaker in entrepreneurship and how women lead, she is a widely recognized because of her unique ability to connect people and facilitate rich conversations that make change happen.
Connect with Julie on LinkedIn https://www.linkedin.com/in/julie-castro-abrams/
This article was previously published on howwomenlead.com.
https://www.howwomenlead.com/post/the-confidence-tightrope-4-thing-to-ask-yourself-at-work
Book Recommendation of the Month
