Family Ministries - Marriage Encouragement

Empathy. James 1:19 says, “So then, my beloved brethren, let every man be swift to hear, slow to speak, slow to wrath.” Many times, we have this backward – we are slow to hear, swift to speak and swift to wrath. In Jennifer Jill Schwirzer’s book, 13 Weeks to Peace, she recommends the “EAR” method to gain more empathy with others and to live out James 1:19. This can be helpful in marriage. Empathy = Ask and Reflect. Ask questions to get better understanding of your spouse and reflect and what they are saying. Once your spouse feels “heard”, it will build trust.

Reflection: Building empathy is a skill that can be learned. The goal is not to necessarily agree with your spouse, but to better understand them.

Thought for prayer: Ask God to help be a better listener; to be slow to speak and slow to anger. To build better bonds with our spouse through asking questions and reflecting on what they say.